A question I hear often from kid readers is “How can you write for us when you’re an adult?” There’s a lot of reasons why this question pops up, but one of the biggest is the fact that adults simply aren’t kids. In their minds, we don’t look like them, we aren’t interested in the same things, and—perhaps most importantly of all—we don’t sound like them. If we’re not careful, the dialogue we write for kid characters will only confirm we’re not the best people to be putting stories together for them. To avoid dialogue that’s stiff, unrealistic, or just plain boring, let’s look at two main concepts to keep in mind when you sit down and try to get into the sneakers of your kid protagonist.
Use Code Switching
A subtle but powerful marker of kid dialogue is code switching. This term refers to the way people change how they talk in different groups. Put simply, if you’re an eleven-year-old, you don’t sound the same talking with your parents as you do with your friends. Adults code switch, too, though it’s often less noticeable. Kids who fit into the MG age range are stepping beyond their families for the first time, and they have the chance to make connections with people of all ages. These relationships are great opportunities to show different dimensions of your character, especially if the dialogue can show us different sides of their personality.
If your dialogue is feeling stiff, ask yourself these questions:
- How does my character’s dialogue change when they’re talking with someone their age? Someone older? Younger? Someone in their family? A stranger? Consider how much they might interrupt, not finish a sentence, enunciate, mumble, take charge, or ask more questions.
- If their dialogue doesn’t change, what does that show readers about their personality?
Avoid Writing Tiny Grownups
One of the worst things that can happen in dialogue is giving your kid character a vocabulary and way of speaking that makes them sound like an adult when it isn’t intended to be a character trait. As adults, we’re steeped in specialized language and terms like “juxtaposition” and “voluminous.” We’re more adept at using language to communicate, comfortable with the differences between “angst,” “depression,” and “discouragement.” Kids, on the other hand, simply don’t have a lot of experience wrapping things in language, much less knowing there’s a word for what they’re trying to describe or convey. This includes kids who are passionate about very niche topics as well. While they might know everything about arthropods or camshafts, they likely won’t be as fluent in talking about how their best friend moving away feels.
If you’re not sure if you’re writing a tiny grownup, here are some questions for you:
- How does my character talk about complicated topics like emotions? If what they say sounds like it could be said by a therapist, it’s likely not a good fit for your kid character.
- Does my character use technical terms, jargon, big words, or specialized language? If so, where would they have learned it? Why do they use words like this?
- If you’re still not sure, give a scene of dialogue to friend who’s not familiar with the story and ask them how old they think the characters are. If they guess incorrectly, ask them which words or phrases made them think the way they did.
Do Field Research If Needed
If you need real-world inspiration, take time to hang out in places where kids gather. Even better is to find places where there’s a mix of ages, such as libraries, schools, malls, and theaters. Listen closely and take notes on what you observe, especially when it comes to how people talk to each other, what words and tone they use, who talks more, and so on. Reading is another great way to see how other authors have approximated the often messy, not grammatically correct way we have conversations.
It’s important to get dialogue right in middle grade. Play with the way your character talks and see what happens!





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